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ryansgulch
[Private to Steve Rogers. SO SO PRIVATE.]
Aug. 4th, 2012 08:35 pm[talking hurts, moving hurts. But Eddie's spent some time getting to know this little device so Steve gets a surprise text]
Why didn't you let me die.
[Edward Blake. TW-Mentions of Rape, mentions of male castration, mentions of poison, torture (on behalf of both parties)]
Why didn't you let me die.
[Edward Blake. TW-Mentions of Rape, mentions of male castration, mentions of poison, torture (on behalf of both parties)]
[Have Eddie barge. Eddie sitting in his room with an unlit cigar, studying the camera like Will Rogers about to give a lecture. He doesn't look the part however, he's wearing a black tank top and showing off his well muscled form. Why the tank-top.
It's the closest thing he has to his uniform. Also he's drunk. Slightly. But none of you can tell that.
give it time.]
( Cut while Eddie explains the following quote: Today Americans are overcome not by the sense of endless possibility but by the banality of the social order they have erected against it. Drinking and death of children mentioned. )
[Poem by Eugene McCarthy]
It's the closest thing he has to his uniform. Also he's drunk. Slightly. But none of you can tell that.
give it time.]
( Cut while Eddie explains the following quote: Today Americans are overcome not by the sense of endless possibility but by the banality of the social order they have erected against it. Drinking and death of children mentioned. )
[Poem by Eugene McCarthy]
[Eddie has not paid attention to the network. Apart from that...incredibly weird thing happening to his warden people had just been bitching. He passed a number of people in the throes of some inner psychosis (feel free to have witnessed him doing this). However he has plans now. Angry amusing plans.
Angry because-he's stuck here. apparently redeemable despite all of the things he's done. An angry and embittered unhappy man and today. Well, today is plum in his pudding.]
Hot damn that was funny. Hysterical even. But I see how fucked a lot of you have been apologizing and shit like that so please. feel free if I ever act like that much of a moron-to put a bullet in my head. [Unsaid: I was thinking about doing the same for all of you.]
[Private to Captain ~*America*~]
Today's father's day. I want to celebrate it. Also your return to normal size. But mostly "Father's Day."
[By celebrate he means the fact that his kid is, well, dead. In essence.]
[As always. Warnings abound for these particular posts.]
Angry because-he's stuck here. apparently redeemable despite all of the things he's done. An angry and embittered unhappy man and today. Well, today is plum in his pudding.]
Hot damn that was funny. Hysterical even. But I see how fucked a lot of you have been apologizing and shit like that so please. feel free if I ever act like that much of a moron-to put a bullet in my head. [Unsaid: I was thinking about doing the same for all of you.]
[Private to Captain ~*America*~]
Today's father's day. I want to celebrate it. Also your return to normal size. But mostly "Father's Day."
[By celebrate he means the fact that his kid is, well, dead. In essence.]
[As always. Warnings abound for these particular posts.]
Assignment 003 [Video]
May. 26th, 2012 01:17 am[Have a video barge, from down in zero. The comedian has gone through every magazine he could, tossed them aside and is leaning back against the wall trying to focus.]
Since none of you seem to understand the concept of irony, I'm willing to be magnanimous. I'm hedging my fucking bets here that if none of you see the concept of irony on this goddamn hellhole you won't know what magnanimous means. All the same.
I would like to know, if you're willing to share, what brings you or what brought you here.
[He makes a gesture with his hands, indicating inviting people in to speak. a small "Please continue" to the world.]
Because if you spend enough time reading over this fucking network it reads less like a prison of any kind and more like a goddamn half-assed teenage soap opera written by a bunch of in-bred agoraphobic social misfits too busy dreaming of being fucked by a bunch of attractive people who they wouldn't have a shot with outside of their own sick imaginations.
This is the network as a hole, the two days I was holed up in my fake fucking apartment. [He clears his throat and adopts mimicking tones. Each one's appropriate to the setting and might be reminiscent of characters on the barge.]
"Oh hell. I've suddenly broken a fucking nail and I cannot continue to function."
"My life is worthless and without meaning. This place has reduced me to a shallow fucking stereotype of myself and who I am."
"I'm a pompous asshole full of comical airs about myself. I'm most likely hiding a deep dark secret like a hidden fucking gay affair or communist fucking leaning and I have not made my peace with that."
"I have a stick up my ass the size of Texas and just as unruly."
There are maybe three of you, three of you who have your heads on straight. The rest of you really ought to look around and ask yourselves if there isn't something fishy about all of this. It's a moot fucking point either way.
[And Eddie looks decidedly lost.] ...It's all a fucking joke even if the rest of you assholes are too dumb to see it.
Either let me out or get me a new magazine. I'm bored as fuck down here.
Content Warning For: potential racism, intolerance, mocking homosexuality, mocking various barge presonas.
Since none of you seem to understand the concept of irony, I'm willing to be magnanimous. I'm hedging my fucking bets here that if none of you see the concept of irony on this goddamn hellhole you won't know what magnanimous means. All the same.
I would like to know, if you're willing to share, what brings you or what brought you here.
[He makes a gesture with his hands, indicating inviting people in to speak. a small "Please continue" to the world.]
Because if you spend enough time reading over this fucking network it reads less like a prison of any kind and more like a goddamn half-assed teenage soap opera written by a bunch of in-bred agoraphobic social misfits too busy dreaming of being fucked by a bunch of attractive people who they wouldn't have a shot with outside of their own sick imaginations.
This is the network as a hole, the two days I was holed up in my fake fucking apartment. [He clears his throat and adopts mimicking tones. Each one's appropriate to the setting and might be reminiscent of characters on the barge.]
"Oh hell. I've suddenly broken a fucking nail and I cannot continue to function."
"My life is worthless and without meaning. This place has reduced me to a shallow fucking stereotype of myself and who I am."
"I'm a pompous asshole full of comical airs about myself. I'm most likely hiding a deep dark secret like a hidden fucking gay affair or communist fucking leaning and I have not made my peace with that."
"I have a stick up my ass the size of Texas and just as unruly."
There are maybe three of you, three of you who have your heads on straight. The rest of you really ought to look around and ask yourselves if there isn't something fishy about all of this. It's a moot fucking point either way.
[And Eddie looks decidedly lost.] ...It's all a fucking joke even if the rest of you assholes are too dumb to see it.
Either let me out or get me a new magazine. I'm bored as fuck down here.
Content Warning For: potential racism, intolerance, mocking homosexuality, mocking various barge presonas.
Assignment 002. [Video]
May. 21st, 2012 05:48 pm[Ladies and Gentlemen. The Comedian. Edward Morgan Blake, with...a big nasty welt over one eye and a few bandages over cuts and scrapes. He looks...surprisingly unconcerned by all of this, tilting his his head back against the pillows.]
Here's a joke for you all. A man dies. Pearly gates, he's met by Saint Peter. Pete says, "You united a group of people, brought hope and pride to the desperate. You gave people a cause to believe in. You brought a struggling nation back to power and thousands of people appreciated everything you did. You saved millions of people from death, starvation, and poverty. 'Course you can come in."
[The scarred side of his face tilts up and he smiles. It is a tired nasty smile.]
Guy comes up to St. Peter and says, "Pete, I think you may have made a mistake." Pete says "Oh? Why?" And the man says, "That guy you just let in was Adolf Hitler." It's a funny joke when you tell it to guys sitting in Europe in 1942. See, then you tell it to people anywhere else any other time else and they might say. Well. fill in the blank.
[He shakes his head] Call off your dogs wardens. I won't make anymore anymore fuss. Sit here and be a good little boy and everything.
[Private to Rorshach.]
We need to speak. Now.
[Content Warning: Holocaust, Military Discussions, War, embittered behavior.]
Here's a joke for you all. A man dies. Pearly gates, he's met by Saint Peter. Pete says, "You united a group of people, brought hope and pride to the desperate. You gave people a cause to believe in. You brought a struggling nation back to power and thousands of people appreciated everything you did. You saved millions of people from death, starvation, and poverty. 'Course you can come in."
[The scarred side of his face tilts up and he smiles. It is a tired nasty smile.]
Guy comes up to St. Peter and says, "Pete, I think you may have made a mistake." Pete says "Oh? Why?" And the man says, "That guy you just let in was Adolf Hitler." It's a funny joke when you tell it to guys sitting in Europe in 1942. See, then you tell it to people anywhere else any other time else and they might say. Well. fill in the blank.
[He shakes his head] Call off your dogs wardens. I won't make anymore anymore fuss. Sit here and be a good little boy and everything.
[Private to Rorshach.]
We need to speak. Now.
[Content Warning: Holocaust, Military Discussions, War, embittered behavior.]
[There's a crackle over the audio post and a voice. An older male. The comedian has been here for a couple of days now, watching your excuses and all the shit you kids are doing. And he's decided it's time to get off.]
Please...Help me. I've-I've fallen.
[he sounds pathetic. Hurt and in pain. There's a groan.] What kind of place is this? Where an- [There's a grunt] An old man falls and nobody's around to help him? what kind of a rest-home is this?
[There is a clatter and the sound of a voice, some of you might recognize it as Hoffman.]
...Oh thank god. Thank god. Yes-sir?
[And the audio cuts]
Please...Help me. I've-I've fallen.
[he sounds pathetic. Hurt and in pain. There's a groan.] What kind of place is this? Where an- [There's a grunt] An old man falls and nobody's around to help him? what kind of a rest-home is this?
[There is a clatter and the sound of a voice, some of you might recognize it as Hoffman.]
...Oh thank god. Thank god. Yes-sir?
[And the audio cuts]
Why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as well as prohibition did, in five years Americans would be the smartest race of people on Earth.
Will Rogers
( Last Thursday: A comedian died in New York. This Friday. He comes to a roleplaying game. )
How's my Driving?
May. 17th, 2012 12:16 pm“America makes prodigious mistakes, America has colossal faults, but one thing cannot be denied: America is always on the move. She may be going to Hell, of course, but at least she isn't standing still.”
-EE Cummings
“America is a mistake, a giant mistake.”
-Sigmund Freud
“By the age of six the average child will have completed the basic American education.... From television, the child will have learned how to pick a lock, commit a fairly elaborate bank holdup, prevent wetness all day long, get the laundry twice as white, and kill people with a variety of sophisticated armaments.”
- Anonymous.
“You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after they've tried everything else.”
-Winston Churchill
“What the people want is very simple - they want an America as good as its promise.”
- Barbara Jones
“Why should we be frightened? No people who have ever lived on this earth have fought harder, paid a higher price for freedom, or done more to advance the dignity of man than the living Americans, those Americans living in this land today.”
- Ronald Regan
“We Americans, we're a simple people . . . but piss us off, and we'll bomb your cities.”
-Robin Williams
It is incredibly important that I hear every concern you have about me playing the comedian. Anything that I can do to ease your playing experience, stay in character as long as it does not deviate from my rule about playing the character which is all sexually explicit and hyper violent discussions must be put under a cot and toned down for the sake of gameplay please do not hesitate to let me know.
I can be reached by plurk~socalramen or on aim~bubblegumofficer. Leave a comment here as well.
-EE Cummings
“America is a mistake, a giant mistake.”
-Sigmund Freud
“By the age of six the average child will have completed the basic American education.... From television, the child will have learned how to pick a lock, commit a fairly elaborate bank holdup, prevent wetness all day long, get the laundry twice as white, and kill people with a variety of sophisticated armaments.”
- Anonymous.
“You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after they've tried everything else.”
-Winston Churchill
“What the people want is very simple - they want an America as good as its promise.”
- Barbara Jones
“Why should we be frightened? No people who have ever lived on this earth have fought harder, paid a higher price for freedom, or done more to advance the dignity of man than the living Americans, those Americans living in this land today.”
- Ronald Regan
“We Americans, we're a simple people . . . but piss us off, and we'll bomb your cities.”
-Robin Williams
It is incredibly important that I hear every concern you have about me playing the comedian. Anything that I can do to ease your playing experience, stay in character as long as it does not deviate from my rule about playing the character which is all sexually explicit and hyper violent discussions must be put under a cot and toned down for the sake of gameplay please do not hesitate to let me know.
I can be reached by plurk~socalramen or on aim~bubblegumofficer. Leave a comment here as well.
